Zone One

Oh this book is great. Zombie novel-y enough to keep a buffoon like me entertained, but smart enough to make me feel smug reading it on the subway. In other words, this book is like:

• Donuts accompanied by 18 year old Glenfiddich
• Watching an amusing and, yet, incredibly moving and poignant Pixar movie. So, all of them, except Cars & Cars 2 (the headlights should be the eyes! The headlights!)
• Spending all afternoon reading Star magazines at the nail salon while getting a super classy French manicure
• Taking B.S. college classes like Pop Culture Studies where the homework is watching The Simpsons.

Read this book and fall in love with the Zombie novel again! I bet that quote makes the back cover of the paperback edition, mark my words.

4 out of 5 metaphors showing us that WE ARE THE ZOMBIES omg my liiiiiiiiife!

Dead Until Dark & Living Dead in Dallas

Sooooookay. Suh-kay. Suh-kaaaay. And Beeeel. Biiiilllll. Beee-luh? Lesson learned: it's hard to write in a Southern accent. So if you get annoyed watching True Blood and hearing Sookie & Bill dramatically call for each other, you might do better with the Charlaine Harris books the show is based on. However, although, take into account, the flip-side: there aren't enough adjectives in the English language to properly convey the glory of Alexander Skarsgard's giant, Swedish, and often nude form. So what will it be: brain candy books sans scenery-chewing or brain-candy HDTV with all its perks? I guess you can have both; you were never going to read War & Peace anyway.

3.5 Viking butts out of 5.