Game Change

Reading this book is worth it for the moisturizing effects of the John Edwards chapters alone - the grease oozing off of the pages has made my skin smoother and my hair more lustrous (but not so bouncy that anyone would accuse me of a $400 salon visit).

There was enough drama, back-stabbing, and general bitchery in the 2008 elections to make an episode of the Real Housewives look like Romper Room. The highs were dizzyingly high (Obama's speech at the Democratic National Convention!) and the lows were mind-blowingly low ("I can see Alaska from my hooooouse!"). This book is the treasure at the end of the rainbow made of Hilary Clinton's pantsuits. Bring on November 2012 - this book already showed us Obama's faults & failings in the run up to the elections, so I really can't wait for the inside scoop on Mittens Romney - not to mention Herman "There's A Lot of Women I Didn't Sexually Harass" Cain, Michele "Crazy Eyes" Bachmann, Rick "Brokeback Style" Perry , Newt "Child Janitor" Gingrich, and Rick "Santorum" Santorum. OH GOD WRITE GAME CHANGE: 2012 IMMEDIATELY PLEASE.

4 "you betcha's" out of 5.

Oprah

Oprah A Biography by Kitty Kelley is heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeere! A "friend" lent me this book in an effort to make me hate Oprah (I say "friend" because what kind of true friend would want you to hate Oprah?). BUT, here's my beef - yes, Oprah is a narcissist with delusions of grandeur (but she is kind of grand, so maybe it's not a delusion). HOWEVER, the stories that try to make you hate her are all like "I used to work for Oprah and, the nerve, she used to ask us what extravagant presents we wanted and then GIVE THEM TO US." What a narcissistic bitch. Oprah: Do you need a librarian? Call me. I'll organize all your back issues of O Magazine. I don't think it's weird that you're on the cover of every single one!*

This book could have used more Gayle & Stedman though. I think we all know that they're really the ones pulling the strings.

3 dates with Roger Ebert out of 5.

*Ok, it's a little weird.