Ancillary Justice

This book is like the best Star Trek set-up ever; minus the Star Trek. On the show(s), the crew would always blunder into some ongoing epic drama and proceed to stick their sweaty faces in, mucking up the works and making it all about THEM for 60 minutes. I mean, come on Kirk, did you not get enough attention as a child? For real.

Ann Leckie's crafted a unique novel; one that manages to be fast-paced and action-packed while still diving into complex philosophical issues. How will humanity change when technology allows for immortality? When AI makes our objects sentient? When an individual can be split among thousands of bodies? When AI reaches a certain threshold, what differentiates it from a human? Deep thoughts, yo.

i09 named it the best book of 2013, and it's definitely deserving of accolades. Lately I've appreciate novels that assume I'm smart enough to figure it out, and dive into their worlds without too much exposition or hand-holding. That definitely applies here, as from the first page we're immediately on Breq's quest for justice with her, and the back story is revealed in flashbacks over the course of the novel. I did find the gender swapping slightly confusing (in the Radch society, everyone is a "her" regardless of gender - unless I just missed the point and this is actually a lesbian space opera, in which case, even better), but I appreciate the attention to detail that Leckie brought to her world.

So, if you like Star Trek but wish the episodes would delve more into the societal structures & struggles of the Gorn, the Borg, the Cardassians...etc - this book is for you.* Or if you just like kick-ass space quests.

4 androgynous, yet sexy, space jumpsuits out of 5.

As always, you can follow along with everything I'm reading here.

*Yes, I know this book is actually about humans, not aliens. You get my point. NERD!

Doctor Sleep

It's hard for me to give an unbiased review of any Stephen King book. From the ages of 13-18 he was like my surrogate boyfriend*: staying up late with me, telling me all about things my parents definitely didn't want me to know about, and scaring the bejeesus out of me (that's how love works, right? Help meee). 

And after I went to college and started slutting around, literature-wise (how you doin', Sarah Waters? Looking good, Michael Chabon!), we stayed on great terms. I no longer needed to have his latest hot off of the presses, but when I did get to it I'd always feel a rush of nostalgia and hum a little Buck Owens. Best of all, it felt like we were maturing together! Lisey's Story & Full Dark, No Stars managed to become two of my favorites by him - still plenty of thrills & chills; no terrifying clown demons needed. 

And now, this! A sequel to The Shining. The SHINING you guys. Arguably his most famous novel, definitely one of his best - so dark and layered and ominous and if all you know is the movie, you gots to get on that mass market paperback train, yo. That movie is great but it might as well have been an Asylum joint called "The Gleaming," for how little it holds true to King's plot and vision. 

Have you read The Shining?

You've read it?

For sure - like, you know what happens with the...and then the...and you know that he doesn't....?

Okay, you may proceed.

So, Danny Torrance is all grown. He's a drunk and a drifter, haunted by both his father's addictions and the remnants of the Overlook's evil. His shining proves to have an upside, though, as he finds work at a hospice and discovers he can help soothe the patients as they die. Hence: Dr. Sleep. 

His story is told in tandem with that of a little girl born a few towns over, Abra, who has unusually strong shining abilities - unfortunately they're so powerful that they attract the attention of some shine-sucking immortal vampiric creatures who travel around the U.S. in RVs torturing similarly gifted little kids and slurping up their sweet shine-juice. Yup, these dudes are no good, and Danny and Abra are going to take. Them. Down! Shine Twins activate!

Here's where the bias comes in: is it a little goofy? Yes. Is it scary? Not especially, though there are definitely some uneasy passages (Stephen King why do you keep trying to ruin bathtubs/indoor plumbing for me?!).

Did I love it? OF COURSE I DID. I'm no longer a young, bookish loner who needs paperbacks to get her heartbeat racing. I'm an old, bookish loner who can watch Breaking Bad whenever she needs to feel alive again. I'm okay with a book by an old friend (Stevie!) that brings back another old friend (Danny!), and lets him fight crime with a cute, precocious teen. I've gone soft, and that's cool.** Stephen King has, too, apparently....for now.

BIASED REVIEW: Stephen King Stephen Kings out of Stephen King. 

UNBIASED REVIEW: 3 goofball Mystery-style velvet top-hats out of 5.

*so much hotter than having an ACTUAL boyfriend, you guys

**I even teared up a the end...you know the part with ___? Where he helped him by ___? And it was like aaahhhhh of course!!!??? And then he looks back? Yeah that part. *Sniff*

The Orphan Master's Son

This one is a doozy. It feels like historical fiction, because everything about North Korea's oppressive regime seems like something that should no longer exist in the world. It feels like satire, or parody, for the same reasons. It's almost reminiscent of Catch-22 in some parts...but then you stop reading and start Googling to get more information on North Korea and...you stop smirking. Quickly.

What Adam Johnson has written is a sweeping tragic romance /adventure story; a Pulitzer Prize-winning novel that explores what might be lost by people living in a society where every intimacy is suspect and self-expression is a dangerous endeavor. And imagines what they might be able to hold onto, despite it all. It took me a few chapters to get into it - I almost felt a little culture shock. But by the half-way point, I couldn't put it down. The story of Jun Do, an orphan, wanders improbably from nefarious missions to fishing boats to Texas (!) to prison camps...and that's just the first half. Johnson never loses the thread, and his characters are beautifully and hauntingly realized. Even when inserting a real-life figure into his fiction, it's done skillfully and naturally enough that you don't find yourself raising your eyebrows and saying 'Hey! That guy!' (aka The Forrest Gump effect).

Read this book. Go where it takes you. Learn more - and consider a donation. Feel all the things!

4.5 Dear Leaders out of 5.

Shadow and Bone & Siege and Storm: A Sexy Kick-Ass YA Twofer

A friend* sent me both these books, the first in Bardugo's Grisha Trilogy. I was more than a little over the whole "YA heroine in a dystopian world finds her inner strength and also there's a love trilogy and also Jennifer Lawrence could totally play her in the movie" - you know, that old chestnut. But I'm a sucker for a book with a map in the beginning, and a killer session with Rasputin by Boney M in Just Dance 2 had just gotten me a new high score, so I was open to a story set in an alternate reality best described as Tsarist Russia + witches. And lo -  I was rewarded. 

What I love about this series is that it's dark as shiiiiit. So much YA fiction doesn't have teeth (It took Harry Potter four books before a kid died - where's the fun in that?). Bardugo's Ravka is a messed up land ruled by a milquetoast King and a sexy and mysterious Grisha (basically a wizaaaaaard but sexier? Like, Manganiello stubble instead of a long grey beard? You got it) called the Darkling.  There's a literal rift across the country, in the form of the Unsea, an area of permanent darkness and man-eating monsters; and a metaphorical one, between the powerful Grisha army and the rest of the population, who both need & fear the Grishas' power. Enter the heroine, Alina Starkov. And yes, she's great and written with depth - but The Darkling is the star here, people. So much so that my only criticism is that the books lose some oomph when the story strays too far from the powerful commander-in-chief and his murky motives. 

I read both books in a weekend. I want more. Also CAPES, can capes come back in style? There are mad capes in these books.

In conclusion: Hunger Games? More like HUNGER LAMES. Books 1 & 2 of the Grisha trilogy: 4 dramatic cape swishes out of 5. 

*the friend works for MacMillan, who published these books. Thanks Claire! I need to disclose that? To the 20 people who read this blog? MOM I MADE IT I GOT A FREE BOOK! 

Lonesome Dove

This book is like a stew. BEAR WITH ME PEOPLE! This is going somewhere.

Day 1 of stew: This stew is okay. It's stew - what do you want me to say? It's simple and it's filling.

Day 2 of stew: Sure, this stew isn't fancy. But I was working as a professional business lady all day and it's nice to be able to heat up a comforting bowl for dinner.

Day 3 of stew: This stew keeps getting better & better. All the flavors are coming together. Stew - you keep surprising me! I am glad I have a giant tub of you in the fridge.

Day 4: What a long day. I am glad I have you, Stew. You are coziness personified. You are like an old friend.

Day 5: STEW THERE IS ONLY ONE BOWL OF YOU LEFT! I'm not ready to say goodbye! At the beginning you felt like you would last forever...but I see now how short-sighted I was. *single tear*

Day 6: There is no more stew. RIP Stew. I'm sorry I took you for granted in the beginning. I could make you again, but it won't be the same as the first time. Goodbye. Goodbye...forever. *sobs*

Additional notes on Lonesome Dove that don't fit into a stew metaphor (believe me, I tried):

• Fantastic character names. Pea Eye! Newt! Dish! Soupy! Dang, now I feel like I probably could have worked those names into a stew metaphor. Lazy, Jane!
• The dialog is amazing enough to make you want to slip snippets of it into your own conversations. This will result in an uncomfortable silence when you're on a conference call at work with your New York office about the Q4 budget and you say, "I doubt it matters where you die...but it matters where you live."
• This is the type of novel that is rightly described as "epic," and an "opus." Epic & Opus would also be acceptable character names in a Larry McMurtry novel, I think.

5 grizzly bear fighting bulls out of 5.

Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail

The term "armchair travel," in addition to being silly, refers to books or other proxies that give you the experience of a place/trip without ever having to get off of your fat ass and out of the house. I guess "an armchair travel book" sells it better than "you know you'll never get it together enough to spend the summer biking through Tuscany, so read about this person who did. They are also better looking than you."

Cheryl Strayed has written a book I would describe as "armchair wilderness therapy." You know, those programs that troubled kids get sent to after appearing on Maury Povich episodes about "out of control teens." Strayed's is the book you read to (via armchair) get your shit together so that you CAN (via armchair) travel to Tuscany and live your best life.

Is this a new record for the amount of words I've written in a review without actually describing anything substantial about the book in question? No? How...about....now?

Making up for lost time: Strayed's memoir, of the summer she hiked a section of the Pacific Crest Trail, is powerful and honest. It's so vividly descriptive, of both the trail & her state of mind, that it feels like she wrote it as she walked along, not years after the fact. Anyone who has ever faced a turning point in their early adulthood (so...everyone?) will find themselves nodding along, and may even start to look for their hiking boots in the closet before getting distracted by an old bag of gummy bears they find sticking out of their purse. Gummy bears never go bad - fun fact!

Read this book. You will find more than expired candy.

5 blood-filled blisters out of 5.

Ready Player One

This is a book perfect for gaming nerds, and I really enjoyed it - despite being TOO nerdy for it. See, I never played the adventure, shoot 'em up, wizard & dragon games. My favorite computer game was Civilization. Yes - you could spend the game waging war and taking over the earth, which I suppose would be pretty badass. I say "suppose" because I always preferred to win using SCIENCE and become the first civilization to reach Alpha Centauri. I WAS SUCH A GODDAMNED NERD.

Anyway, I have friends now and I have kissed a boy, so it's fine. And my lack of experience with 80s arcade staples and dice-based adventures did not diminish my enjoyment of Ready Player One. It's set in a dystopian future where everyone spends most of their time plugged into a massive online role-playing game. When the eccentric, 80s-obssesed creator dies, he wills his vast fortune and control of the game to whoever can first solve a series of clues that will lead them to three challenges, three keys, and three gates.

My only complaint is a pretty literal deus ex machina that pops up near the end - but by that time you're already casting the inevitable movie version of the story* so I guess I'll allow it.

4 epic Rush guitar solos out of 5.

*Wade = Donald Glover , Art3mis = Lena Dunham, Sorrento = Willem Dafoe. Are you telling me you wouldn't watch that movie? Exactly.

Game Change

Reading this book is worth it for the moisturizing effects of the John Edwards chapters alone - the grease oozing off of the pages has made my skin smoother and my hair more lustrous (but not so bouncy that anyone would accuse me of a $400 salon visit).

There was enough drama, back-stabbing, and general bitchery in the 2008 elections to make an episode of the Real Housewives look like Romper Room. The highs were dizzyingly high (Obama's speech at the Democratic National Convention!) and the lows were mind-blowingly low ("I can see Alaska from my hooooouse!"). This book is the treasure at the end of the rainbow made of Hilary Clinton's pantsuits. Bring on November 2012 - this book already showed us Obama's faults & failings in the run up to the elections, so I really can't wait for the inside scoop on Mittens Romney - not to mention Herman "There's A Lot of Women I Didn't Sexually Harass" Cain, Michele "Crazy Eyes" Bachmann, Rick "Brokeback Style" Perry , Newt "Child Janitor" Gingrich, and Rick "Santorum" Santorum. OH GOD WRITE GAME CHANGE: 2012 IMMEDIATELY PLEASE.

4 "you betcha's" out of 5.

Naamah's Kiss

Jacqueline Carey writes sexy books about sexy people. Sometimes these people sleep with everyone but it's ok because they're part of a sexy religion and they have sexy gods. It's a big sex-positive party up in here. And there's a dragon in this one! This book is fun. It's about a girl whose bear god (not one of the sexy gods, unless you're into bears) sends her on a quest to find her destiny!!! that takes her all around the world. This is one of those books that has a map at the beginning. It's basically a map of our world, but everything has a different name (Britain = Alba, China = Chi'in...etc). Does that makes this an alternate history? Or alternate geography? Maybe the author just didn't want to draw a new map. I'm cool with it.

3 heaving bosoms out of 5.